Balanced

Balanced has become a very popular word in our language these days. The implication is becoming clear to all of us who hear it constantly repeated in every passionate plea for our attention. Our whole world is becoming unbalanced and is about to tip over on its side. In their efforts to save the world, they beg us to quickly run over to their side to help.

Balanced this and balanced that, balanced diet, balanced approach, balanced budget: we teeter on the edge of the abyss as they plead with us to share their fears as they ask us to focus on their side of the subject at hand. Every time I hear the word "balanced" I know I’m in for a prolonged effort to educate me on the dangers of picking one side too soon. If they are using the word "balanced", there is another side to the issue and it is unlikely they are going to share it with me.

After lecturing me on the need to keep an open mind, they proceed to fill my ear with a few carefully selected facts on the subject hoping to tip the scales in their favor. I hold a lot of these people responsible for the times I have chosen to take a side before I discovered what the real score was, only to find to my dismay that I had joined the losing team. When it comes to losing your balance, this feels like falling off the curb and getting run over by a truck.

Sometimes I decide the safest place for me might be up in the observation tower yelling encouragement to both sides. Having no opinion just encourages them to try harder to persuade you to join their team. The best advice I can give you here, is that until you pick a side, you should stay away from the edge of the tower platform. If they give up trying to persuade you, they will sometimes give you a shove just to vent a little of their frustration. If you lose your balance up there, at least you get a few seconds on the way down to think about the mistake you almost made, before you hit the ground.

It took awhile, but I finally figured out that there are times when balance is really important, and other times when leverage is the best way to get something done. Leverage is what we use to knock someone else off balance. Think of leverage as a balancing tool. That tool gives us an opportunity to get around them if they are becoming an obstacle. The noises they make while we are doing this gives everyone the impression that they are becoming a little "unbalanced." We can then use this to our advantage as well.

Sometimes we can even get them to spend a little time in the observation tower or on the sidelines. Up in the tower, on the fence, or in the psychologists office, it makes no difference to us as long as we are able to convince them to get off the playing field and out of our way. This is the best place for most everyone until they make up their mind. If we force them to pick a side before they are better informed, the world will most certainly start to tip over again.

Seeing the words "balanced" and "leverage" used in the same sentence makes it easier to consider the fact that balanced is a passive activity, whereas leverage is an aggressive one. To test this theory we can now look at simple actions like our diets, and realize that a balanced diet is used to maintain an ideal body weight, and a weight-loss diet is a form of leverage we use to aggressively force ourselves back to the “ideal.” This works for budgets, politics, housekeeping, and even child-rearing as long as we can find some leverage and have a clear picture of what’s “ideal.”

Now that we have set up our analogy of a balanced approach to forming our opinions, let’s go back and see what makes it all true. The goal here is to get everyone we can on the winning team. The question here is what makes an opinion a balanced one? What turns an opinion into an aggressive one? And, what do we use for leverage to get it all back into balance? Remember to think of leverage as a balancing tool.

As strange as it might seem, there is one answer for all three of these questions. That one answer is knowledge. But, before we start using our knowledge as leverage, we need to make sure we are joining the winning team. That requires that we spend a little time observing which way the world is tipped so we can do our part to get it back in balance. What we are now looking for is what "ideal" is. You cannot have balance without it.

All this talk about balance has helped me to realize that those who seek balance in their lives have to be willing to form their opinions with the knowledge that there are two sides to every issue. If you want to do this, listening to both sides in order to find your balance, and still stay in the game, you have no other choice than to become a referee. At least that way you can get both sides to the middle now and then, even if it is just for the coin toss.

The best thing about being a referee is that they can all yell and scream at you for as long as they dare, and then you get to make the final decision as to whether they have broken the rules. You know the rules. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, love your neighbor as yourself. Yeah! Those rules!! And, in an “ideal” world anyone who doesn’t play by the rules loses their right to have an opinion.

If you like being told "I told you so." Try my other blog: This Old Man

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